Derek goes to Ethiopia

One day, two years after the bakery incident, Derek decided that he would like to go to Ethiopia to be an explorer. He had read about caves full of treasure there, and had immediately began to pack. He didn't have any money, but he had heard that on some ships you can work for your passage. He decided to cross the English Channel, to Spain, and then to Morocco. That night he said to his mom, "I'm going to Ethiopia, pack me a HUGE lunch and supper, please." She didn't say anything, but got up the next morning and went to the bakery where Derek had gotten ill.(She still didn't know.) She walked in, and said, "Hello, my son is going to Ethiopia, may I please have a baguette, with ham, mustard, and gherkins." "Of course, and would you like some currant cookies? I got a new stock of currants, so I didn't have to use flies, and I have some doughnuts." "That sounds good, but can you squish them? My son loves squashed jam doughnuts." The lady sat on the doughnuts, and all the jam squished out, and she put them in the bag, with a large bottle of orange juice, and Derek's mom left. She put it all in a basket with some clothes and sent Derek on his way. he walked until he thought, 'this has to be Dover. I'll have lunch.' He sat down in a park, and took out his baguette and took a bite. Immediately he jumped up, screamed and the blew out fire! The store attendant had put a whole jar of English mustard on it! (English mustard is as hot and spicy as wasabi, if you cancel the horseradish.) He threw the sandwich in the bin, and drank all his juice. He took out one of his currant cookies. CRACK! He spat out a broken tooth! Oh no! The lady had accidently put red beads on instead! Derek groaned, and stared to take out the beads. By the time that he had gotten all the beads out, he only had a pile of crumbs! Suddenly a cloud of pigeons landed on him and ate all the crumbs! Derek held his breath and counted to ten so that he wouldn't scream. 'The day can't get any worse.' he thought.